4 ways to get below the surface with your spouse
Continue Reading...Archives For Be A Student of Your Spouse
When you stop being a student of your spouse, you lose interest in who they are as a person. These articles give tips about continuing to learn more about your spouse! The more you study – the better grades you get in the long run!
If you are a true student of your spouse, you should be able to answer these simple questions about them. How well Did you Do?
Continue Reading...
When I was working afternoon drive at the top 40 station in New Orleans, it was a pretty uneventful job. Come in, check out the latest news, voice a few commercials, go on the air for 4 hours, play some “booty music” (it really was), talk to some people on the air, go home.
Two of our four walls in the studio were windows. Looking out, we stared directly at the Superdome across the street. On most days no one was there, but working a Sunday shift on Game day was a beast.
I was having a normal birthday. Didn’t make much of it. I don’t think anyone at the station knew about it.
I look up and, outside the soundproof studio door, I see my wife’s head behind a large leafy plant. She comes in, sits the plant down on the desk behind the control room computer. It’s filled with cigars.
She has taken thin metal spikes and taped them to the cigars, so they look like they are growing in the plant.
(Writing this is making me want a cigar. I haven’t had one in more than a year!)
It was a very cool, thoughtful gift.
Why was it a great sign of affection? I’ll look at it through the filter I presented earlier in the week: Affection is SWEET…sensual, well timed, engaging, easy and tender.
1. It was well timed – She knew I had to work on my birthday and that no one at the station would be celebrating my birthday. It showed she was thinking of me and that I was important to her.
2. I enjoy a good cigar, and she knows that. Even though she hates the smell – she loves me. That makes it tender in my book…playful, light, fun.
3. She engaged me by taking time out of her day to come to my work, give me something I enjoy, and it was completely unexpected.
4. It was creative – but not necessarily easy. The easy part was that she knew what I liked.
5. It was not ‘physically’ sensual – like a hug or a kiss — but it did get my attention — and it was something that I enjoyed.
Birthdays and Holidays are great times to show affection. What do you know – Thanksgiving and Christmas are right around the corner!
Do you have anything affectionate planned for your spouse? (ahem…guys…this is geared more towards you!)
photo by alexbrn
If you slow down long enough to realize you don’t know your partner as well as you think you do…you’ll stop finishing their sentences.
Because you realize you don’t know what they’re going to say.
You don’t know everything about them like you think you do.
We’re very pompous. When we have been in a relationship (anywhere longer than a week) we get over comfortable thinking we know everything about our partner.
We rush.
Go fast.
We dont’ take enough time to listen to them because we assume we know them much better than we really do.
Slow Down.
Listen to your Marriage Mate.
You dont’ know everything about them like you think you do.
(There are things about your spouse you may NEVER know. I know. Its mind boggling)
photo by Miss BlackButterfly
When we stop learning about our spouse, we stop communicating.
When I believe I know all about my wife, I become less interested.
This leads to boredom, and sadly,for many, it has led to extra marital mingling.
If I continue to remember that she has an infinite soul – that she is more than just a top layer of person – that she has many many layers -
That keeps me interested in her. It keeps me wanting to learn more about her.
Get back to the 118 Fun and Easy Marriage Tips!
