Finding Time Together

You will never “find” time for anything. If you want time you will make it. –Charles Buxton

I sat at the hospital all day.   I knew that I should have been writing.   However, I also needed to be present in the room to help ease the tensions of my family and keep conversation going.   I didn’t want the mood to get heavy and somber while waiting for my grandfather to get out of surgery.

Tonight, I write while lying on the mattress stuck between bookshelves in the make shift spare bedroom-office-converted garage in my grandparents house.  I am finding time to do what I feel is important.  On this trip – my grandfather has been the important one.  We found the time to visit him in his time of need.

Where do you find time in your life to be together with your spouse?

My beautiful wife™ and I actually talked about that on our drive…… there wouldn’t be much time away from family — for alone time with one another on this trip.  For the short term, it isn’t a big deal.  A couple days spent focusing on my grandfather is needed.  But what if you never find time for one another?

All the ‘little things’ of life can get in the way – you know what they are,  I don’t need to list them.  Here are a couple thoughts on how we try to find time together while living a busy life.

Finding Time Together

Communication is key to finding the time to spend together.  Compare schedules to see when you have time you can spend with one another.

Being ‘work at home’ parents, we have had Weekly Meetings to talk about our goals and plans for the week.  It also gives us time together to check in and talk about other things – not just work.  To be honest, our weekly meetings have morphed into Monthly Meetings.  We work so closely together in the house, we haven’t needed a weekly check in, but every month we try to set aside some time to regroup.  Depending on your marriage – you can decide which might work for you.

We pray together at the end of every day.  It’s become our ritual.  These aren’t super duper huge flowery prayers – they are usually short, a couple thank yous to God for the day – and a couple requests for us and others.  When you hear your spouse praying – even with ‘small’ stuff, you get an idea of their heart, and what is on their mind.  It’s another way to connect and find time with your spouse.

Our family tries to eat dinner together most nights.  We don’t always sit around the table.  Sometimes we are in the living room, sometimes we go to McDonald’s or Chick-Fil-A.  No matter where you are,  eating together does wonders for connecting again with your spouse – and family.

A quick check in on the cell phone is always nice.  When I was working outside the house, I would always call after a big meeting or a stressful interaction.  I wanted to talk to my best friend.  And the same goes for my wife — when she is working out of the house, she’ll call to tell me of the great meeting with clients, or what I need to pick up at the store!

By no means is this list exhaustive. It’s a starting point. What do you in your life to find time with your spouse?

photo by brandon shigeta

Comments

  1. mathi says

    You are absolutely right about quality time together. Most couples think that if they reside in the same house they are spending their time as a family. Unless there is humor, love, warmth and care in your conversation your marriage struggles to retain its freshness. When you notice the goodness of your spouse, appreciate his\her fine points and revel in your time together you enjoy incredible happiness in your married life.