I Love You Because… Episode 142

I Love you Because… its a list Stu Wrote for Lisa…and also a young woman getting married in just a handful of days has a question

I Love you Because...

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On the Show Today:

 

We are back after summer!

The Plan going forward with our shows (at least for the time being…) is to produce TWO SEASONS Yearly. Its like the TV Season model.

Out seasons, that we are going to explore for the time being, are

Fall/Winter Season – September to Early December (after Thanksgiving, Before Christmas)

Winter/Spring Season – Late January to June

We learned in the past couple years with the show, that Summer was a difficult time to be consistent with the show, and around the holidays late in the year/Back to School in January, its also difficult to be consistent.

We will still take emails, and we will probably post some during the breaks – maybe new blog posts or highlighting other marriage encouragers that we know!

I LOVE YOU BECAUSE…

I listened to a great podcast (check it out here) about being specific with our love. Its easy to say “I Love you” in a generic sense, but out love should be specific. This tool, “I love you because” gives you an opportunity to show love to someone else in a specific way – not just a general passing shallow “Love ya”.

Lisa mentioned Gary Thomas’ Book Sacred Marriage – She didn’t use the title, but this is what she was talking about 😉

QUESTION:

My future husband hasn’t done the things I asked him to to prepare for our wedding day… he is a major procrastinator! What do I do?

How to be a sweetheart, not a nagging wife

Dangers of Procrastination

Develop a Team Mentality on Your marriage

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THANKS!

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Photo credit: pixabay

About Stu Gray

Stu is Husband to Lisa and a Dad to the coolest kiddo around. He's a book lover, writer, Batman Fan, and a speaker into microphones and rooms full of people. Get Marriage encouragement in your email when you subscribe to Stupendous Marriage updates!

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1 comment

  1. Hey Gray family! I’ve been binge listening to your show as I just discovered it earlier today. I’m blessed with a job that allows me to listen to whatever I want for pretty close to 8 hours out of every 10-12hr day. (Yes, I really do work that long every day, 5 days a week. That’s life kid!)

    Anyway, I was intrigued by something Lisa said today when offering advice to a blushing bride who had concerns about her future husband’s procrastination. I’m not great with direct quotes, but the jist of it was basically advising that the bride-to-be non-confrontationally share her heart about her concerns with her future husband, offer to take over some of the various tasks in his list, and then ask him to set a timeline for when she can expect his remaining list of things to be done. This is supposed to help alleviate her concern. If I understood correctly, this is something Lisa does in your marriage, and I think it’s a great concept. But what caught me was what Lisa said about how the tasks had better be done according to the set timeline, or else. So here’s my question… What happens when they’re NOT done? What IS the consequence? And what happens when NOT meeting a previously agreed upon expectation becomes the norm? Is it all just left to the wife to pick up the slack and take over all the tasks the husband didn’t complete? (Or vice-versa if that’s the case)

    Please email me and let me know if you reply to this. It’s a major problem in my own marriage as I work excessively long hours and my husband is at home, unable to work outside the home due to immigration laws, and yet with all the time in the world on his hands, he somehow constantly fails to meet expectations set for himself and instead spends his time doing basically ANYTHING else, including nothing at all. We are certain it has to do with a spirit of rebellion in his life due to his family of origin, and it almost certainly also has do to with his lack of drive and independence, but the question remains, regardless of the reason… When a spouse doesn’t meet agreed upon expectations, what is the other spouse to do? I do NOT want to turn into the nagging wife or take on the mother role in his life, but it feels like I’m out of options. What do you suggest?

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